"If you love someone, the greatest gift you can give them is your presence"

Thich Nhat Hanh

One of the things I love most about being in a relationship is, somewhat narcissistically, what another person is able to teach me about myself. A long time spent with a significant other, warts and all, shines a mirror into all the places you might not be able to see or wish to acknowledge. One of the most common observations I get from my other half is that I'm not often really there, not listening...so, how shall we say - not present.

Not present? Teaching yoga, I'm perhaps more preoccupied with the subject of mindfulness than others. In fact, beyond all the fun moving through postures, I see my yoga practice as really one big exercise in 'presencing'. For that time I dedicate to the mat, I'm focused inward, single-minded and concentrated on my posture and breath with laser intent.

Yet when I step off my mat, the mind starts to whir - what to have for dinner, what do I need to do tomorrow? Because I share the same space as my husband, sometimes I think that means we are spending time together, and that's enough. But I can be so preoccupied with cleaning, my to-do list, or whatever else that draws my attention, that I zone out and I'm not really listening, not really there. I'm ashamed to say, he pulls me up on it - a lot.

My beloved reminds me of how often I fall short when being present with others. The late, great Thich Nhat Hanh said that the greatest gift you can give is presence. Presence itself is the core of connection. I am reminded today to do better - to cultivate the presence we build on the mat, off the mat.

Perhaps today can be a day (Valentine's or not) where we give another person the gift of presence - the best gift there is.

With love today, and every day!

Chang